Dogma At Hogwarts
by Caliam Baggins Took
Summary: As the title says, some characters from Dogma come to Hogwarts. God's sense of humor has gone WAY to far. NOTE: There are characters from my story Metatron Little Angel. Please R+R
1. The Egg Soaked Owl and the Letter from H...

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Dogma or Harry Potter. I wish I did though... *sniffles*

~*~Chapter 1~*~

*We enter to see Loki, Mya, and Kimmie playing out in the front yard. They all have their swimsuits on. Loki is holding a hose and he is trying to spray Mya and Kimmie who are hiding behind Bethany's car.*

Mya: We have to figure out something to do! *Mya whispers to Kimmie and ducks behind the car once again.*

Kimmie: I think I have an idea! *Kimmie crawls out from behind the car and runs inside. A few minutes later she runs back and ducks behind the car once again. She was holding a bag and inside was none other then raw scrambled egg balloons?*

Mya: Ewww, where did you get that idea? *Mya asks and takes on in her hand.*

Kimmie: TV! *Kimmie shrugs and laughs. She also takes a balloon.* On my command we both throw. Ready! Aim! Fire!

*They both thrown their balloons. One hits Loki the other hits and owl?*

Mya: Oh My Goodness! I hit that poor little owl! *Mya runs from behind the car and to the owl, which is lying in a puddle of water covered in egg. Mya picks it up.*

Mya: I'm sorry Mr.Owl I didn't mean to hit you! Oh my, what do you got there? *Mya notices two letters it had dropped. She puts down the owl, which immediately gets up and tries to fly away, and picks up the letters. One is to her and the other to Kimmie*

*Kimmie notices the letters in Mya's hand so she gets up and walks over to her.*

Kimmie: Who are they from?

Mya: A place called Hogwarts. *Mya hands Kimmie her letter. Kimmie takes it and opens it. Kimmie begins to read:*

Kimmie: Dear Ms. Sloane, you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry... *Kimmie quickly looks at Mya who has a confused look on her face. Kimmie continues to read.* Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later then July 31. 

Mya: Holy cow... 

Kimmie: They have to be kidding us... I have no magical talent... Anyway I thought using magic was a sin?

Mya: I though that to. Lets show Loki. *Kimmie nods.*

*Mya and Kimmie get up and run over to Loki showing him the letters.*

Loki: I dunno man. They seem real enough. But why you two? You probably blow up the whole school! *Mya backslaps Loki.*

Kimmie: I guess now we should show our parents, since HE isn't HELPING much! *Mya laughs and nods following Kimmie into the house. They go into the kitchen where their parents, Metatron and Bethany are talking. Kimmie goes to her mother* Mom, we just got this from an owl! We aren't sure what it means... Do you know?

*Bethany looks over the letter for a minute, as does Metatron*

Bethany: I have no idea...

Metatron: It seems as if someone has finally recognized your talents. I knew this was coming...

*Mya and Kimmie both smile*

Mya: Does this mean we are going?

Metatron: Uhum... Loki will be going with you though. He will be turned into an 11-year-old like...

*Kimmie interrupts* Why?

Metatron: Because of Bartleby. We found out that he's going to. And he is on Voldemort's side. Loki has the duty of protecting you and Harry Potter.

Mya: Harry Potter?

Metatron: A very famous boy wizard. He survived the Avada Kedavra curse after Voldemort tried to kill him with it. You will hear much about him at the school so don't fret.

Mya: Well, how are we supposed to get all of this stuff? *Mya says looking down the list of the materials they needed.*

Metatron: It's easy like this! *he snaps his fingers and it all appears before them*

Mya: Of course... you always have to do it the easy way! *Mya laughs*

Kimmie: Hold up a sec. How can Loki be made into an 11-year-old?

Mya: With God around honey, anything is possible! *Mya laughs*


	2. God's Sense of Humor Has Gone Way To FAR...

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Dogma or Harry Potter. That's obvious...  
  
~Chapter 2~  
  
*They all laugh and Mya smiles with triumph*  
  
Mya: HA! I knew I could make you guys laugh one of these days.  
  
*Kimmie smiles at Mya and walks over to the slide-n-glass doors in the dining room. She gives a confused look when she sees another owl outside of the screened in room of the pool. She opens the door and walks outside. She opens the door to the screened in room cautiously and the owl flies in. Kimmie spins around to see it fly in the house.*  
  
Kimmie: Heads up guys!  
  
*Kimmie laughs when she heard a loud 'OW!' from inside. She runs in to see Mya rubbing her head.*  
  
Mya: The owl flew into me!  
  
Kimmie: I can see that...  
  
*Kimmie looks at her mom to see her holding a letter*  
  
Kimmie: What's it for?  
  
Bethany: I dunno...  
  
Metatron: Oh no.  
  
Mya: What? What's wrong?  
  
Metatron: God's sense f humor has gone too far...  
  
Mya: Can I see it? *Mya asks her father. He nods and hands her the letter. She reads silently to herself. 'You have been accepted to Hogwarts school of...' Mya's mouth opens in disbelief*  
  
Mya: What is this supposed to mean? You're not exactly a child.  
  
Kimmie: Mya, if I were you I'd take that comment back...  
  
*Mya and Kimmie stare on in disbelief at their parents who are now once again 11-year-olds*  
  
Bethany: What are you two staring at?  
  
Kimmie: Just look in the mirror...  
  
*Bethany and Metatron go to the nearest mirror, which happens to be in the hall. Mya suppresses a giggle when she hears a gasp from the hall.*  
  
Metatron:(his voice now much of an 11-year-old) Yep, God's sense of humor has gone too far!  
  
*Mya and Kimmie walk to their parents.*  
  
Mya: It's like those dreams you have where your parents are children! Dude!  
  
Kimmie: Must you say Dude?*Mya shrugs and laughs*  
  
Mya: Now what are we supposed to do? Go to this Diagon Alley place?  
  
Metatron: Not yet we have to wait for Loki.*The doorbell rings* Ah and that's him now.  
  
*Kimmie rushes to the door and opens it. Revealing not Loki, but Rufus and Serendipity, and they too are 11*  
  
Mya: Now can someone please tell me is this turning into one of those weird Sci-Fi movies or what?  
  
*Kimmie opens the door fully so the two can walk in. They walk over to Metatron.*  
  
Rufus: I thought you said we weren't going to be apart of this little 'trip to Hogwarts'?  
  
Metatron: Well, so did I. But obviously God had other plans.  
  
Serendipity: So this means we have to go to that school? With all the screaming kids? And magic?  
  
*Metatron nods. Mya jumps up when she hears the doorbell ring again. She opens it and there stands an 11-year-old Loki.*  
  
Loki: Hey! Don't I look good?  
  
*Mya smiles nervously and opens the door fully for him to come in*  
  
Metatron: I guess this means we can leave now.  
  
Loki: Leave? I just arrived let's get this party started!  
  
Metatron: This isn't a party Loki, we have to leave now in order to buy everything we need, and to make it on the Hogwarts Express.  
  
Loki: Fine...  
  
*Loki slumps his shoulders and begins to walk out the door, everyone else in tow.* 


	3. Diagon Alley and Mya meets Harry Potter

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Dogma or Harry Potter. That's obvious... If I did I would be rich and I would be writing movies or real stories not fan fiction!  
  
A/N: Yes this changes the first book... but eh? Wouldn't this just be the coolest little movie you ever did see? LOL!!!  
  
~Chapter 3~   
  
*In Diagon Alley they all split up. Mya, Kimmie, and Loki went on way. Metatron, Bethany, Rufus, and Serendipity went the other. Mya, Kimmie, and Loki decided that first they would stop to get their school robes. After being sized and paying for their robes there walk out of the store bright smiles on their face.*  
  
Mya: Guys, do you mind if I go alone for a little bit? All this togetherness is making me uncomfortable.  
  
*Loki and Kimmie shrug. Mya smiles and walks on without them. She walks around for awhile and then spots a store that looks like fun. It was Olivander's Wand Shop. She smiles and opens the door walking in. She was surprised when she saw no one in there.*  
  
Mya: Hello? Is anyone here?  
  
*When no one answers she starts to look around. The walls were lined with boxes and boxes of wands. She jumps when she hears some one that was now at the counter.*  
  
Voice: What do you want?  
  
*Mya turns around and smiles*  
  
Mya: I am here for my wand, sir.  
  
Olivander: Another first year? *Mya nods* Well, then will you wait a moment here while I go find a wand that would be suitable for you? *Mya nods again, Olivander disappears to the back of the shop. Mya jumps when she hears someone enter the shop behind her. She turns around and sees a boy that's about her height with black hair and green eyes. He has a lightning scar that is barely visible on his head and he was wearing glasses.*  
  
Mya: Oh hello. Are you getting your wand to go to Hogwarts to?  
  
Harry: Yes I am. I can't wait until term starts. When I found out I was going I was astonished. 'Me Harry Potter going to a magic school?' That's exactly what I thought and now I'm here.  
  
Mya: Oh, your Harry Potter? My dad told me about you a day ago. I'm Mya ummm I'm Mya Angel.  
  
*Harry smiles. Olivander comes back to the front of the shop. He hands Mya her wand to try out. He sees Harry Potter and immediately recognizes him. Mya zones that out and looks to Harry, who looks nervous, she smiles at him. A few minutes later she had paid for her wand and bid her farewell to Harry. She walked out of the store and ran right into Loki. He caught his balance but Mya fell back.*  
  
Loki: Oops. Mya I'm sorry. *Mya looks at him with an evil look and gets up.*  
  
Kimmie: We got all your books and stuff for you. We just thought it would be nice. Got your wand I see? *Mya nods*  
  
Loki: Do you mind watching the stuff while we go in to get ours? *Mya nods and sits down next to the pile of stuff.*  
  
*A few minutes late they come out talking about how they just met Harry Potter and all that. They pick up their stuff without saying thanks to Mya and they walk off. Mya sighs and picks up her things to follow them.*  
  
*Late that night they all sat in a motel room showing off the stuff they had gotten. The anticipation of the next day filling them.* 


End file.
